so last night iWent out with the dolls & we had OD fun! (: we went bowling. & yes bowling is the new thing to do. watch iBet maad heads are gonna start doin that. lOl we're trendsetters. LMFAO. anyways so we has to walk from auburn to worcester last night. michaelea was distraught cause she had capri's on. ahahah we were all laughing at her. the walk was a good 25 minutes & when we got to the bowling alley place michaeleas legs were purple. lmfao* im still laughing about that. ahah so yeah when we got there we seen some cheeeks girlss, and we was laughing at them cause they were really tryna grillll. lmao* oh yeah how do you wear blue, gold, and black & match? ahah YOU DONT. lmfao oh yeaaah joke of the night was "GUTTAAA" lmao iLove my ladiess. & betcha didnt know that all of our names end in a. ahahha - shimona, melissa, tiana, isadora, & michaelea. interesting huh corey. (: thankss for that one. but yeah we met some sexy's. lmao & they were obv. scared to talk. aahhah until like an hour & a half later. lmao (: anyways so yeah iHad a great night cause iFeel like we all needed to have one girls night. its beeen forever since the last time we went out. oh yeah & we went for mitata's birthday. aahah evern though that shit was monday. (: lOl so yeah when iGot home maaad heads started calling me. iFelt OD loved. (: ahhaha then iGot one phone call that just turned my night around for the worst. -_- iWas reallly upset & iStill am. but ugh whatev. you cant rain on my parade. OH NO YOU CANT ! so todayy iWoke up mad sleepy still. & iHave nothing to do today, with no ride anywhere. :/ ugh. this really sucksss. well i'll probably write another blog later seeing that iHave nothing else to do. actually ima work on my english project. (:
"& she's the kind of girl who could be holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and no one would ever know."
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
befuddled.
so its been OD long. my fault. :/ but yeah hmmm iAm confused. seems like i'm always that way. lOl. but yeah like idk what to do because like iLove someone but iHave 2 people trying to "bag." ahaha iFeel like im always put in the position as if iAm the bad guy. -_- like iM attempting to be as nice as iPossibly can but it's not working apparently. :/ so you now what FUCK IT. no more nice girl because in the end the nice one just gets fucked over. im getting my life straight & im gonna focus on whats important to me.! school, dance, reading, friends, and him. thats it. iCan no longer try to be nice to everyone iKnow.
So as of right now, ahaha im on the phone with some child. he's fxcking retarded. -_- like ugh. WHY ARE BOYS SO STUPID. do they have any idea of how to speak to a girl? Oh, iDidnt think so. iHate the fact that it feels to me that this isnt going to work. iFeel like im giving a mile and he's giving an inch. iFeel like we take 5 steps forward to get pushed 10 steps back. iDunno ijust wanna hear "iLove you shimonaaa." ahah that would make my day. but iGuess you cant have everything that you want. and whats meant to be will always find its way. ugh. anyways my vacation sucks so far. :/ like iHavent went out anywhere. aahah im so boring. iNeed to go to the Y & work out im gettting morbidly obese. ahaha like im getting so mad right now so im getting off the computer. ugh. BYE. Friday, February 6, 2009
chilliando. (:
hmmm so umm yeah ihavent wrote anything in mad long aha but since the last time i wrote shit is going okayy. so tuesday was alright. wednesday was great! ahah actually not. but niggas are like so wack. irealized on wednesday that people lie outta there asss to keep themselves safe. like idont understand why people do that. :/ but yeah shits okay iguess & this all makes no sense. but irealized that IAM A TRENDSETTTER ! ahaha! yo deadasss everyone does what ido. which is really silly because like come on its just me. wtf. anyways so yeah umm next... so ihate when this man is trying to play mind games. dont try to get with me & my best friend. it doesnt work like that. we're with eachother everyday. & you honestly think that we wouldnt talk to eachother?! thats funnny & then you just deny it. CUTE reallly cute naht ! like damn im stupid but not as stupid as you think iam. seriously.
Pssssssssssssssssssssssssssst. so mona's bestfriend came thru too write on this blogg this too. well i agree on what you said above yo. how can he be soo stupid to spit game to you & me knowin DAMN well we talk to each other 24/7. stupidd stupidd stupidd.
but anywaysz GuysAreDirt! they stay tryna playyy us.
anywaysz I Love You Monaaaaaaaaaa
[NuggetLaNuggz came thruu on 2 6'9]
Pssssssssssssssssssssssssssst. so mona's bestfriend came thru too write on this blogg this too. well i agree on what you said above yo. how can he be soo stupid to spit game to you & me knowin DAMN well we talk to each other 24/7. stupidd stupidd stupidd.
but anywaysz GuysAreDirt! they stay tryna playyy us.
anywaysz I Love You Monaaaaaaaaaa
[NuggetLaNuggz came thruu on 2 6'9]
Monday, February 2, 2009
not a good day.
today was a bad day. like it sucked. inever thought he'd see me cry. well so much for thinking that. ifucking cried. yeah idid. & idk anymore. my heart just really fucking hurts. iguess there's somethings people dont know about me. iguess its that my smiles are fake, and when no one's around my "happy smiles" turn into watery tears. ilove & care about people who dont care about me, & ihave a hard time lettting things go. some people love me & some hate me. but it doesnt matter. iguess ijust wish things were the way they used to be so my smiles can be real again.
idk im just lost...
Sunday, February 1, 2009
my broken heart. -_-
welll today was an ugh day. like idont even know whats going on. ahah iwent to church this morning. but yeah ifelt okayy, so now idk. im trying to like be nice to someone but ifeeel like they want nothing to do with me. aha. :/ ifeel like im being pushed away. and idk im just trying to make it work but iguess its not. & the closer you try to pull, someone the farther you're actually pushing them away. which really sucksss. ifeel like im in a hole and im only sinking sinking sinking. :/nothing sucks more than being hurt by someone you thought loved you. it'll all get better in time. idont really have much else to sayy accept that this is the illest quote. (:
"Here's to all those girls who used to be his number one. The girls who waited all night for him to call, only to check the caller ID the next morning and be disappointed. The girls who made it through that bitter break up, dried your own tears, and moved on with your life, only to have him walk back in it months later like nothing ever happened. this is for the girls who cried on the first day you two talked again because you knew exactly where this phone call was going. The girls who listened to him say, ionly want to be your friend, one day, and the next, listened to him say how much he loves and misses you. We deserve something, and this is our tribute. Here's to the girls that took him back, hoping that maybe this time, he was different, hoping that maybe people really do change. we listened to our friends tell us that we were stupid for even thinking about giving him another chance, caught crap from our parents, and even snuck around to see him for while. We went through the great stage with no fights all over again. We started this out thinking it would be just friends, and ended up falling in love with him again. We wanted nothing more in the world than to hear him tell us he loved us too, that even though things were bad in the past, they would be different this time. And when we finally heard it, it was like we were dreaming. This is for us. Here's to the girls who believed what he said, sat around all over again waiting for a phone call that might come in a few hours, or a few days. Here's for the tears cried and dried all over again. We wanted so desperately to believe that he was really busy, he couldn't possibly call us at that moment, or even that he fell asleep early. We trained ourselves to believe the lies because we wanted to believe we had found the one for us. We learned to SETTLE for someone who didn't treat us the way we should be treated. this is for the girls who did their hair and make up and put on their prettiest earrings, only to hear him say that he couldn't see us today. The ones who never believed it when people told us there might be someone else. We just couldn't believe that he could do this to us again. This is for those great girls, who loved him more than words can say, and took him back no matter what happened last time because they couldn't bear to look back on their lives one day and wonder "what if". This is for the girls that stayed up all night long listening to him whine about an ex girlfriend who cheated on him, and cried during the entire conversation. This is for the girls who hoped he would realize that he deserved better, that he deserved us. When he said that he loved you, but he was in love with her, he didn't mean it. This is for the ones that held on to something that was never there to begin with. This is for us girls, who somehow managed to get him to forget about her, and get him to tell us that he was in love with us again, only to have him tell us three weeks later that "things were going too fast, he needs time." Here's to the girls who couldn't cry to their friends because of how stupid they felt. The girls who held it all in when things came crumbling to pieces again. This is for the ones who couldn't bear to even tell their mom what was going on, for fear of an "I told you so." The ones that could just TELL that they had made a mistake ever allowing him into their hearts, and their dreams again. We knew that we deserved better the entire time that we deserved a guy who would call when he said he was going to, one that would come see us whenever he got the chance, one that would really care about us. We just wanted the one that we loved like that. Here's for the ones that FINALLY realized that he never gave a crap about them. Here's for the time that he broke your heart again. This is for those days spent trying to hold back the tears, and the tears that turned into anger, then disappointment. Here's for us girls who finally realized that we deserve better. This is for those confusing days, when you miss him, and want nothing more than to hear his voice, or feel his arms around your waist. Stay strong, and remember that relationships are like broken glass, sometimes it's better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together and get hurt. Remember the times you cried, and how long it took you to even be able to look at another guy like that. When "your song" comes on the radio, turn the station. When the day comes that he realizes what a mistake he made and tries calling, turn your phone off. When he tries coming to your house, don't answer the door. Think of the broken promises, and the lies, the manipulation and the tears, the wasted moments and staying up all night wondering where the crap he was. Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night, and how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn't him, and realized that once again, he hadn't called when he said he was going to. One day, you'll find a guy whose worth all the tears, but he won't make you cry. You may think that you'll never care about someone like you did that guy that you always ran back to, but you will. It's gonna hurt like crap, and it's going to need time to heal, but the point is, it will heal. This is for those girls, who fell back in love with a guy, only to get hurt all over again."
"Here's to all those girls who used to be his number one. The girls who waited all night for him to call, only to check the caller ID the next morning and be disappointed. The girls who made it through that bitter break up, dried your own tears, and moved on with your life, only to have him walk back in it months later like nothing ever happened. this is for the girls who cried on the first day you two talked again because you knew exactly where this phone call was going. The girls who listened to him say, ionly want to be your friend, one day, and the next, listened to him say how much he loves and misses you. We deserve something, and this is our tribute. Here's to the girls that took him back, hoping that maybe this time, he was different, hoping that maybe people really do change. we listened to our friends tell us that we were stupid for even thinking about giving him another chance, caught crap from our parents, and even snuck around to see him for while. We went through the great stage with no fights all over again. We started this out thinking it would be just friends, and ended up falling in love with him again. We wanted nothing more in the world than to hear him tell us he loved us too, that even though things were bad in the past, they would be different this time. And when we finally heard it, it was like we were dreaming. This is for us. Here's to the girls who believed what he said, sat around all over again waiting for a phone call that might come in a few hours, or a few days. Here's for the tears cried and dried all over again. We wanted so desperately to believe that he was really busy, he couldn't possibly call us at that moment, or even that he fell asleep early. We trained ourselves to believe the lies because we wanted to believe we had found the one for us. We learned to SETTLE for someone who didn't treat us the way we should be treated. this is for the girls who did their hair and make up and put on their prettiest earrings, only to hear him say that he couldn't see us today. The ones who never believed it when people told us there might be someone else. We just couldn't believe that he could do this to us again. This is for those great girls, who loved him more than words can say, and took him back no matter what happened last time because they couldn't bear to look back on their lives one day and wonder "what if". This is for the girls that stayed up all night long listening to him whine about an ex girlfriend who cheated on him, and cried during the entire conversation. This is for the girls who hoped he would realize that he deserved better, that he deserved us. When he said that he loved you, but he was in love with her, he didn't mean it. This is for the ones that held on to something that was never there to begin with. This is for us girls, who somehow managed to get him to forget about her, and get him to tell us that he was in love with us again, only to have him tell us three weeks later that "things were going too fast, he needs time." Here's to the girls who couldn't cry to their friends because of how stupid they felt. The girls who held it all in when things came crumbling to pieces again. This is for the ones who couldn't bear to even tell their mom what was going on, for fear of an "I told you so." The ones that could just TELL that they had made a mistake ever allowing him into their hearts, and their dreams again. We knew that we deserved better the entire time that we deserved a guy who would call when he said he was going to, one that would come see us whenever he got the chance, one that would really care about us. We just wanted the one that we loved like that. Here's for the ones that FINALLY realized that he never gave a crap about them. Here's for the time that he broke your heart again. This is for those days spent trying to hold back the tears, and the tears that turned into anger, then disappointment. Here's for us girls who finally realized that we deserve better. This is for those confusing days, when you miss him, and want nothing more than to hear his voice, or feel his arms around your waist. Stay strong, and remember that relationships are like broken glass, sometimes it's better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together and get hurt. Remember the times you cried, and how long it took you to even be able to look at another guy like that. When "your song" comes on the radio, turn the station. When the day comes that he realizes what a mistake he made and tries calling, turn your phone off. When he tries coming to your house, don't answer the door. Think of the broken promises, and the lies, the manipulation and the tears, the wasted moments and staying up all night wondering where the crap he was. Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night, and how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn't him, and realized that once again, he hadn't called when he said he was going to. One day, you'll find a guy whose worth all the tears, but he won't make you cry. You may think that you'll never care about someone like you did that guy that you always ran back to, but you will. It's gonna hurt like crap, and it's going to need time to heal, but the point is, it will heal. This is for those girls, who fell back in love with a guy, only to get hurt all over again."
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