blah.

i havent writtten in OD but i started a journal that i seem to love. (:

my dance teacher gave it to me. but yeah. anywhooo,

i feel like i have been riding a rollercoaster, & i been down most of my

ride. :/ like lately things have jussst been worse before they get better.

like idk i dont really wanna write publicy everything that happened,aha

but it doesnt matter.

zander obviously broke my heart. ahahha! theres no hope anymore i

guess. -_- i mean you know how it is when you really care about someone,

like you call them all day long cause you just want to see how their day

is going, and what they're thinking about. i mean after a while trying as

hard as you can gets old, and you just get sick and tired of being hurt. :/

i mean you know what they say;

if you love someone let them go, & if they come back to you then its

meant to be, and if they dont it never was. i guess for me, it all comes

down to me wanting to be with someone who wants me back. and

apparently i cant have that, so i'll be single forever. ha. thats not

funny. ahah eck it makes me sick.

"there is nothing worse in the world, than being dissapointed by

someone you thought loved you."

dynamy-

ha. -_- its 5:39 and i just got out the meeeting at dynamy. ahah i dont think i've ever left a meeting so mad. liks they were all talking about the word "niggga." and how its "so wrong" and

"no one should ever say it" and "stop blaming it on the white people because black people say it too" and blah blah blah. like yo shut the fuck up. and get over it. people are gonna say the word nigga no matter what so just man the fuck up and deal with it. like just because you're a senior doesnt mean that you're any smarter than any of us. like damn yo. for real im so pissed at all of them. like eck. but and so and then the people at my table was allll geeekin, cause we thought the shit was OD funnny. ahah so the whale just came out of no where & was like "MOUTHS CLOSED." and so and then im thinking in my head, shut the fuck up. who the helll are you?! oh yeah thats right, nobody. but yeah after that i just got so pissed so i put my head down. & then i left. like wtf that conversation was so stupid. and it needed to stop before it even got started. eck this is another reason why i dont like this place. -_-

but anyways me lately?... hmm i been alright i guesss. but yeah ummm i have no idea what else is new. i made a new friend! his name is ummm "peter" aaha hes super illlll doggggg. even thought e are complete opposites. lOl but hes od funnny & we hang alot. its great. but umm i might go to junior prom but i dont think so anymore. so yeah, i won the ball ! & i won 1,000 dollarssssss. can youo say gasssed?! hmm i think so. lol but yeah im waiting for my mom 7 its 6:07 now its gettting pretty late. -_- my moms outside. ahah good timing! im outtttt. pceeeeeeeeeeeee. ♥